Darn you Amazon.com and your efficiency!

So, the P90X DVDs came in the mail today. I know that my husband will be itchin' to get started, but I'm pretty sure that I want to wait a little bit.

But then again, why wait? Isn't waiting (a.k.a. procrastinating) the very thing that got me here in the first place?

Well, since hubs is at a dinner meeting tonight, I can probably get away with waiting at least one more day. So, I'll tell you a little bit about myself then.

I'm a mom of three preschoolers (age 5,3, and 1). I have never considered myself thin . . . and certainly never considered myself athletic. I'm 5'6" and hovering around 200 pounds. It might be more now, since we've been living in a hotel for three weeks, eating out practically every day, and lacking access to a scale. We just moved from one extreme part of the country to another part. I know no one here, but I'm excited for this new chapter in our lives.

I haven't liked my body for a very long time. In fact, my weight and my overall appearance has been a concern of mine for over half my life. It began in high school and has followed me through college, marriage, seven moves, and three pregnancies. So, here I am, heavier than I ever have been, and flabbier too. I think my chin is starting to grow a twin. And if my ankles cease being and become cankles, I'll just die.

I gained a bunch of weight with each baby I had. And I never had time to lose that weight before getting pregnant again. To my defense, I was either pregnant or breas feeding for five years straight. On a side note, don't you hate those women who are back in their pre-pregnancy clothes a month or two after having their babies? I have a sister who is like that. She's my best friend, but I just want punch her when she complains about losing that last five pounds. But, she's dedicated to working out every single day. She takes care of herself. So, even though I hate that she's still thin, and I'm not, I can't say that it's all in the genes. She works hard to be as healthy as she is.

I've jokingly told my friends that I'm the girl that makes them feel better about themselves. They can say, "Well at least I'm not as big as she is."

Well, I want to feel better about myself. And I'm not pregnant OR breastfeeding and am done with that part of my life. I want to take the pictures of myself these last few years, and look at them saying, "Well, at least I'm not as fat as the girl in this picture!" The truth is that what I am now (this overweight chic writing to you about trying to lose weight) took a long time to create. I don't worry myself about what I eat (mostly, because I really like to eat). I'm not too dedicated to working out regularly (I could give you 867 excuses why, but I won't).

So, that's what this is all about. Changing those habits that got me to where I am. In the process, I also want to teach my children that drive-thru food isn't the only option, or they'll be where I'm at in twenty some odd years.

So, it's a journey. It's a process. It's equal parts perspiration, healthy mastication, determination, dedication, education, and transformation. It's being me, but a better me. And, a sexier me. A sexier me who feels comfortable enough to wear a two piece on the beach. Yeah. That's the girl you're going to get to meet at the end of all this.

So, yes. Before pictures will be taken tonight. And be posted tomorrow. Hmmmmm . . .